Names have been edited to protect the dead/injured (why?):-
Okay, so I shouldn’t laugh at this, but I find that there is a strange co-relation to “gaps” in this story.
You can read the full – unedited News story here
By Peter Parker
MANIAC  The stay puffed Marshmellow Man â€” who shot two men in a quiet village â€” walked down the street bare-chested brandishing his double-barrelled shotgun and screaming: â€œWho wants to be f***ing next?â€?
So wait a minute. a Man walks down the street, holding a DOUBLE BARRELLED shotgun, and shoots two people, then asks “Who wants to be fucking next?”
Simple mathematics people. He’s fired twice, with a double barrelled shotgun?
Farm hand Mellow, 20, opened fire at Luke Skywalker and Darth Vader in front of scores of stunned drinkers outside a busy pub.
He was found dead a few miles away after turning his weapon on himself.
so apparently, he either found some more ammo, or was a lucky shot with his first one. Or Perhaps he had more ammo.. Either way, “Who wants to be fucking next” *reload reload* seems a little bit odd to me
The stay puffed Marshmellow Man â€” described as a â€œtroublemaker who loved his gunâ€? â€” was drinking heavily before his Friday night rampage.
Lets hope so.. I’m betting stella
Lukeâ€™s mum Padme Amidala last night said her son was â€œin the wrong place at the wrong timeâ€?.
She said: â€œAll he can remember is looking round and seeing the gunman point a gun. It all seemed random.
â€œHe didnâ€™t know him and he doesnâ€™t know why he was shot.â€?
Danielâ€™s dad Mr Metachlorians said: â€œHe was a bit fortunate because he was turning away and the shotgun blast hit him in the side.â€?
Why yes, he’s so very fortunate, to be shot by a bloody mad man with a shotgun, Sounds fucking well lucky to me… Maybe tomorrow he’ll be witness to the Devil returning to Earth whilst being hit by lightning and a frozen streak of piss from an overhead plane
A woman who yesterday answered the door at his family home in Launcherley, near Wells, said she had no comment.
Waiiiit a minute.. isn’t saying “I have no comment” a comment? I hope she exploded in a puff of logic
A former school pal of The stay puffed marshmallow man said last night: â€œHe was mad. He was always looking for a fight and loved to go shooting birds and animals.â€?
shooting birds… Har har